


(he is) (he's not)

by VeryImportantDemon



Category: Daredevil (TV)
Genre: Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Mentions of Cancer, SAD VERY SAD, Songfic, introspective
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-11
Updated: 2016-04-11
Packaged: 2018-06-01 13:53:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6522460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VeryImportantDemon/pseuds/VeryImportantDemon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He is in love, but the shrill, steady pulse tells him too late.</p>
            </blockquote>





	(he is) (he's not)

**Author's Note:**

> well so this happened

He's not in love. Of everything he knows for certain, this fact is at the top of the list, the very, very top. He is not in love, for sure.

Matt Murdock doesn't deserve love, and he sure as hell hasn't gotten it before, so even if this was love, how would he recognize it?

It's easier to say that it isn't love. And it wouldn't work anyway. It wouldn't work anyway. It would never work.  
\---  
He's not in love. Of everything he knows for certain, this fact is at the top of the list, the very, very top. He's not in love, for sure.

Foggy Nelson doesn't deserve love, but he knows what it feels like. After all, he's been in love since he was in college.

It's easier to trick himself, to say that it isn't love. (But it is.) It wouldn't work, anyway, even if Matt knew. It would never work.

\---

He's not in love. Of everything he knows for certain, this fact is at the top of the list, the very, very top. He's not in love, for sure.

Love is a death sentence, right? Matt can't be tied down to someone, to always be worrying about them. Of course, he isn't tied down anymore. He doesn't have anything but this not-love and the cold.

\---

He's not in love. Of everything he knows for certain, this fact is at the top of the list, the very, very top. He's not in love, for sure.

Foggy's been in love since college, and he's had scattered moments of happiness, but all in all, his heart is torn. He doesn't have anything but the faded colors, the memories, the wishes. He doesn't have anything but this torturous not-love in between and the tears.

\---

He misses the smell of his shampoo. He misses the feel of his hair. He misses his laugh. He misses the way Foggy Nelson made him feel whole without trying.

\---

He misses the red-tinted glasses. He misses the way his lips curled up. He misses the way he laughed at stupid jokes. He misses the way Matt Murdock made him feel in love, but he also doesn't.

\---

Matt Murdock is not in love (he can't be), and all he has is the cold.

\---

Foggy Nelson is in love (why is he, why is this love, it's hurts so much), and all he has are memories.

\---

One day, Matt is going to die, and he's ready for that day. What is living if he doesn't know?

\---

One day, Foggy is going to die, and he's ready for that day, that day that's coming too soon because he's so weak he succumbs to cancer. What is living if he knows love but it's too far away?

\---

Matt wants the pain to stop. He wants to know. He'll know soon. He knows where Foggy is, right? He'll find him. He'll know.

\---

Foggy wants the pain to stop. He wants to forget this love, this love he's had for years, because it's brought him sparks of light in the darkness, but mostly it's been the darkness. He'll never feel that love back. Soon, he'll forget. Soon, he won't be around to remember anything.

\---

He's in love. Of everything he knows for certain, this fact is at the top of Matt Murdock's list, the very, very top. He's in love, for sure, but he'll never get the chance to say it. Foggy will never know, because he was too late.

\---

He's in love, but he doesn't want to be. (What is love if they'll never love you back?) Of everything he knows for certain, this fact is at the top of Foggy Nelson's list, the very, very top. He's in love, for sure, but he doesn't want to be because love wouldn't hurt this much. He'll never get the chance to feel this love, this good love. He'll never know, because he was too late.

\---

He's in love. He can feel it, beating in his chest. He is in love, but he's too late. He's too late, he knows, the shrill, steady pulse humming in his ears.


End file.
